Countryside Walks With Piet Haag

by Piet Haag

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Well it starts with an acoustic guitar As you wake up to the sound  Of music from afar And your head feels like A bucket full of glass When you wake up lying  Face down in the grass  And it hurts And the buzz that rises round you  Like the waters of the tay  Is the flies around the sewage  That wouldnae flush away from the portaloo  you blocked up with your spew Heard your girlfriend shout Just as you're passing out You are dumped Ya bam There is nothing like a nice anthemic ballad We can sing When you've consumed so much lager That the words don't mean a thing We're anesthetised We're completely fried   Well you went to hear the music But someone stole your bling Got lost on the campsite And never heard a thing Found your girlfriend blowin' Your best mate in his tent And she's no just dumped you She's spent all of the rent And it ends with the sound of your car Axle deep in cowshit You won't be going far And your head feels like A bucket full of glass When you wake up lying  Face down in the grass  And it hurts
So you're going to south by south west Been invited 'cos you're the finest North west Dunbartonshire has got to offer The looks, the chat, the boots, the specs, the hat,  The hair, the teeth, the self belief, The attitude, you've got just what it takes But beware  the funders have a place  A cellar down below their base They'll hang you upside from your toes stick sharpened pencils up your nose Attach electrodes to your bawz If you don't come back with a deal Their wrath you're gonna feel Gonna make you.... Sing Like a Londoner They're gonna make you sing sing like a Londoner etc.. So you've been to south by south west You did your best, you played your finest But only fourteen people came to see  You broke the bank, your hotel stank You flew a half way round the world, for what You didn't even get a decent sun tan repeat stuff
My song has only got one chord only got one chord one chord My song has only got  only got one chord one just one  chord If thats not enough If you're bored If you need more chords We can add some more  We can add some more My song has got a second verse  Its got a second verse I'm only kidding you Chorus, chorus, chorus
You're not new, you're not new You're not new so you must be old
Well it started when you were just twenty three Still so young and still so free It was a quiet insistent high pitched tone You only ever heard when you were alone In quiet spaces, quiet places So you saw a consultant and he did say It never goes, it's hear to stay  Avoid loud noise as you get old Now get to fuck 'cos you've been told Get out  There is no cure
I love your blog It is the best thing on the web Told all my friends They should subscribe Lots of them did  Now they love you  They really do They really do I love your words Like morning sunlight on the dew In Pollok Park, after a tab Or maybe two The things we'd do Just me and you  And everyone  Cos they all love you They really do We really do And if I sung like Twin Atlantic Would you think I was fantastic If I add a glockenspiel Would that maybe seal the deal Sent you a track But you never emailed back Now my heart is broke and empty Just like my inbox filled with spam And useless junk Four one one scams Hot Russian birds and their webcams And your blog turns up each week But I have never heard a peek.
Sign me up, sign me up Sign me up to Chemikal Underground Records Underground Records I might slightly balding I might be slightly fat My lyrics might be rubbish and my music might be crap  But still each day  I Kneel, I pray I hope to hear the words you say Sign here On the dotted line Sign here  It'll all be fine We won't let EMI Get their hands on you  Act now For this offer will expire Together we can save the world The world Oh God and Jesus Please sign me up For my life is shit shit shit


Countryside Walks With Piet Haag is the exciting new Piet Haag debut album. As the rarely intelligible Haag puts it: "value for money was top of the agenda, and at only £4.13 or just £0.59 per track, we're really trying to get in amongst the competition. If you look at Asda or any of the major supermarkets, thats less than the price of a full breakfast".

Its unusual to hear an artist admit that the songs were secondary, but Piet has fans wellbeing at heart. By skimping on quality recording, keeping writing time to a minimum and not using too many chords he's kept the cost down. "Major labels and indies forget that music lovers need to eat and party, so we've tried to get the balance right. There's only one filler, and the rest are rubbish"

Seven songs of sorrow, despair, misery, horror, sadness, depression, hunger, resignation, resentment, indignation, bitterness, anger, rejection, recrimination, poverty, doubt, fear, reluctance, grief, petulance, and vanity, mixed with the unquenchable human spirit for discovery. Its a compelling brew, and as Piet's friends and family have said, "yeah, sure, we like it".

There has never been a better time to discover new independent acts like Piet Haag, so why not go without breakfast and download the new debut album now?


released August 25, 2011

Piet Haag - vocals, keyboards, tuned percussion
Robin Adams - guitar, bass
Jamie Duffin - drums
Ross Moran - additional guitar
Mervyn Adams - additional guitar, backing vocals, noises
Kat McCarron - backing vocals
Pauline Adams - backing vocals
Alastair Savage - strings, fiddle
Steve Hawkes - trumpet, flugelhorn

Kit Adams - production, engineering
Duke Yowie - cover art

Thanks to everyone at Pie In The Sky Inflatable Budgies for the support.


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Piet Haag Glasgow, UK

Widely regarded as "useless" and "not much good" Piet Haag stormed onto the Pollokshields music scene with his unyielding electro-acoustic interpretation of retail therapy. Even two years later "Instructions for Shopping" serves as a template for sonic gender reversal, allowing women to experience the male perspective on shopping. Like a flambe tomato mixed with Bailey's Irish Cream, its rare ins ... more

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